The End Of A New Chapter

My latest testimony tells the story how I ended up with an internship (New Chapter Of My Life). And that’s exactly what it is: an internship. I wasn’t a full-time employee. So this testimony will express the tale of my endeavor towards earning a fixed position.

The Ticking Bomb

My original contract was set out to end on May 30th. However, I refused to apply to other agencies even when other people told me to. Part of me kept holding unto the strings of hope to get a permanent position. Part of me believed this was an act of faith. Part of me was lazy to start the whole job searching process all over again.

A week before the contract ended, I received an email offering me to extend the internship for another month. I was happy and accepted with no hesitation.

However, the same cycle kept repeating the following month, and the month afterwards. When people asked me how my job is going, I always reply: “I don’t know, I might just leave this month.”

In August, the extension offer came again. They would usually offer one extra month. Note, however, that they offered me 15 days this time. My heart sank as I came to face the truth I had been denying all along:

This is it. This is the end.

Holding On

All this time, my relationship with God had been complacent – at least to me. In all honesty, I had been skipping my Bible reading and morning devotions.  This was a wake-up call that I still needed Him. So I pursued Him back, as I continued to chase after a permanent position. It was a behavior I found so disappointing – only calling out to God when I’ve hit rock bottom. But then again, I’m not a perfect human being.

In my final attempt to cling onto this agency I had grown to love so much, I wrote another email. I explained my desire to stay there because of it’s great environment, the valuable learning experiences I obtained, and the wonderful people present. I finally asked the dreaded question: do I have a chance to stay, or is it time for me to move on?

An email came shortly afterwards, saying: Let’s talk tomorrow.

The following day, the manager asked me to follow her to the back of the office space. It was a wide area with a lot of couches, which the creative department tends to use to hold meetings. This morning, it was drenched in darkness. They had for some reason opted to leave the lights off, which gave a more dramatic tension. There, the president and executive creative director were also awaiting my arrival.

“So we understand that you want to keep working here. What are your plans for the future? Cause we understand that you have a deadline with your OPT?” the manager started to ask me.

I explained how I planned to stay until my OPT ended. That was my intention since the beginning. What came afterwards was the most pleasant surprise I had ever heard.

“We are willing to offer you the H1B working VISA if you choose to keep working with us.”

Words couldn’t express my feelings. I just sat there, looking dumbfounded at the three most important people in the hierarchy. This was way beyond my expectation. I am the person who didn’t attempt to get one. And yet, here I am with the offer of a lifetime. My mind got jumbled up. My firm decision to return to Indonesia got shaken. The offer was too tempting to resist.

God had answered the million-dollar question as soon as I decided to come back to Him. There was no delay on His behalf - He answered right away.

The End Of A New Chapter

Another streams of dilemma hit me as I struggled to make up my mind. In the process, I even wrote a new song called “Close A Door.” Sometimes, God opens a million doors, and you become so confused on what to do. It was in the middle of the composition where God spoke to me and revealed which door He had closed.

I chose to politely decline the offer. I had to go back to Indonesia.

However, the agency had decided to let me stay until the end of the year. So I am no longer an intern, I am now finally a Jr. Designer~ Wohooo~

Friends, it is amazing how God works. The whole job searching process since the beginning until I claimed a permanent position took more than a half-year. But the journey was worth it. God never left my side, even when I left His. He continued to wait, even as I wandered elsewhere. He answered my prayer, even if I sought after Him only during a time of need. He loved me, even when I was unworthy.

And He will do the same for you.

Especially for those who are looking for a job, I can’t emphasize enough how He has already prepared a plan for your future. Your path has already been laid out in front of Him. Just follow its tracks and watch how many doors shall be opened, and closed. Endure it. Pray for it. Believe in it. And you shall obtain it.

So, let me present to you the most quoted Bible verse, because it truly sums up what we need to hear during a waiting period.

“I will bless you with a future filled with hope—a future of success, not of suffering.” – Jeremiah 29:11

The White Fog

Last Sunday when singing "Until I See You," we moved into an intense free worship session. The whole sanctuary was filled with chimes of different tones, voices and words, but were all united to praise God. It was during that moment when the Lord suddenly gave me a vision.

The room we were in was filled with a thick white smoke. Its color was so pure as the snow as it formed a blanket around the sanctuary. Its presence itself was so majestic and a delightful view to behold. Its appearance was so humongous, and yet it felt so soft as cotton. It was simply wonderful. It was God’s tangible presence among us.

There were people who walked straight into the fog. Once they were in, they disappeared. These people love to dwell in God’s presence – once they’re in it, they become so lost. All I could see was the white fog. This represented how when looking at these people, it was so clear to see God’s presence alive in them. When they walk into the fog, it is no longer they, but it is God that we see.

Then there were another group of people. When they saw the majestic fog approaching, they stopped. They hesitated. Should I walk in or not? Fear arose upon the encounter of a strange presence they have never felt or seen before. However, that presence is harmless. That presence is a sweet safe haven we should not be afraid of.  It is our heavenly Father.

To these people, God is inviting you to come into His presence. “Come dwell in me, and I will give you the richest things even the world can’t imagine,” He says. “You will experience something like never before. Do not be afraid… Come to me and I will give you peace…”

God longs for us to be in His presence. Will you open up your heart and accept His invitation?

New Chapter of My Life

Ad Ghetto Event

Last year around the end of October, there was an advertising networking event called Ad Ghetto. Unfortunately, it also happened to be the same day where there was a boba buffet at Little Sweet Café. All the CG members were planning to go there. I was torn between the two, but had purchased my ticket to Ad Ghetto already.

On the day itself, I became so lazy to go and almost bailed out. The Holy Spirit told me to go anyway. Once I was at the event, I met up with one of my friends at AAU who was interning at an ad agency at that time. He introduced me to his supervisor, who happened to be Indonesian! So at least I networked with one person!

At that time we had a class assignment to ask the opinions from professionals about the work in our portfolio. So me and another friend asked our new connection for their help, and they agreed to meet up somewhere in November. Once we were there and sat down with them, the first question they asked was “So you want to intern here?” We were quite surprised since it wasn’t our original intention. So I said “Sure, why not?” Right at the spot, we had a very casual interview and met up with four different people. We didn’t even get to show our portfolio. But they told us they would contact us if they liked it.

Days went by… Weeks passed… Still no news… I was quite sad and didn’t want to start applying to other agencies, believing that I would get this one. It was until early January that I suddenly received an email saying that they were still interested. It was the best news I received this new year! She said they were waiting for approval from the upper management. I waited, but I didn’t hear back from them again for a while.

Break Down

I slowly started to lose hope and gave in to my pride. At first, I only wanted to work at an ad agency in San Francisco. So I started applying to them, but never heard back. I started to lower my standards and started applying to faraway places. Then I let go a little bit more and started applying in-house as a graphic designer (even though my major is advertising). I even opted to do freelancing. In the midst of all craziness, I even applied to Wells Fargo and Google for fun… lol…

Getting a phone call or an interview was very rare. All the emails I received were saying there was another better candidate, or that there were no open positions. My creative recruiters helped me find one ad agency in Pinole. I had a phone interview with them, but they couldn’t proceed if there was no client. Nita reminded me that it’s not about the number; it was all about getting that one right interview. Even so, I was still sad at times and started to feel useless and thought that God didn’t want me to get a job. Even though I tried my best to keep my faith, it started to waver. Countless time I started negotiating with God and tried to persuade Him to give me a job. I got angry at Him…

It was until that Sunday at church when we sang One Thing Remains when I heard God speak to me: “Why don’t you trust me? Don’t you know that I have already provided a job for you?” Hearing that just made me tear up as guilt filled my heart. That day I immediately changed my prayer attitude. I no longer asked God to give me a job, because I had faith that He would provide it for me. Instead, I asked for the patience and endurance to wait until that door will be opened. I later got to know from Melanie that this is what CG Faith had been praying for all this time, and they were so overjoyed my mindset was finally at the right place. (Probably because my sister was the one who was stuck with me during my mental breakdown moments.)

God's Miracle

By this time, I had already applied to approximately 150 companies. I also kept in touch with that ad agency I met from Ad Ghetto, asking if there were any updates, but there wasn't. That week, I got two in person interviews with other companies! One was a Salesforce driven company in SF that needed a graphic designer. Another one was a start up business that needed a web designer. They both simultaneously scheduled to interview me on the same day, and both actually offered me the job on that day. Amazing! I should be feeling happy, but how come I didn’t?

The start-up company had an interesting offer and could pay a lot, but somehow something did not feel right. So I was considering to pray to God: “Lord, if you don’t want me to take this job, then please let an advertising agency contact me tomorrow. Whether it is an email of rejection or acceptance, let them contact me!” As soon as I checked my phone, I saw that there was an email from the ad agency saying that there’s finally an update, and that they would call me tomorrow. I also noticed there was a voicemail message from the recruiter saying that the ad agency in Pinole was still interested. But since it was late, I would have to call them back tomorrow. Out of all days, why would all of them suddenly contact me right on that day to speak to me tomorrow??? Coincidence? I believe not…

Man, I always prayed for God to open up the right door. I now know that I should’ve prayed for Him to lead me through the right door! On top of that, Wells Fargo actually contacted me to proceed to the next stage as well. (Yes, the same one in Oakland where James and Stanley used to work at).

End of Unemployment

The following day, the ad agency from the event called me and said that the internship has finally been approved and that I could start working with them!!! Wohoooo!!! Without second thoughts, I immediately accepted the offer. Never would I have dreamed about rejecting some offers. This was crazy!

Our God gives abundantly!  Waayyy more than what we ever asked. I don’t really know why He wanted me to wait, since this was basically the first ad agency that I applied for. Even so, I truly experienced how God still cares and wants me to end up working at the right place. If He can do this for me, I believe He will do even mightier things for others who are also looking for a job! So guys, be steadfast!!! I truly believe that God has already prepared a place for each one of you!!! Hwaiting! Ganbatte! Jia you!!!! The time will come!!!

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." - Isaiah 55:8-9